51... thinking out loud

[atouchofstrife]

suppose to be private\\very hackable

It's amazing how much a little thing sets me off. Sometimes, it's just a thought or a word, other times it feels like I am strangling in my own head. I guess that some things never truly change even though I know I have grown different from when I'm a kid. It's strange.

It feels weird, not to do that any more. But it's okay. I don't like using them anyways.

I think I talked better with him than I do with Zack. Maybe because he was there. Maybe.

I wonder how Tifa's doing. I miss her. I miss the kids. I need to keep busy though.

Comments

[vampbratprince.livejournal.com]

Your entry is easy to get into, Cloud.

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

...It is?

I used my normal codes.

I think.

[vampbratprince.livejournal.com]

It could be partially due to the curse.

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

Great. Not only does it make me sing and write letters, but now I have to contend with me chatting about anything in my head about how sometimes I...

...

Okay...

[vampbratprince.livejournal.com]

Sometimes you what?

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

...

Nothing really important.

[browning-baby.livejournal.com]

.... you need a better lock, since everyone in this damn city is so nosy, especially Lestat. You know, we were talking and..


..... shit.

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

I thought I was using my normal lock and I just don't know why it's...

I guess it's a truth day?

[browning-baby.livejournal.com]

Verbal diarrhea day is more like it.

I can't seem to shut up and SOMEONE'S taking advantage of it!

[vampbratprince.livejournal.com]

Oh dear. Someone is taking advantage of it?

[browning-baby.livejournal.com]

Yeah, don't even play innocent, Lestat.

[vampbratprince.livejournal.com]

As you wish. I will play the guilty party instead.

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

Maybe sticking my head in a pile of sand would be for the best right now. There are things I don't want to talk about like how...

Yeah.

[browning-baby.livejournal.com]

Sand sucks when it gets in your teeth. Trust me, I remember.... shit. Forget I started that.

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

I've eaten enough sand falling off a racing chocobo....

Guess we are trading stories?

[lyra-of-dust.livejournal.com]

Cloud... I miss her to.

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

She keeps me sane and I mis that as well.

She was nice to you too, wasn't she?

[lyra-of-dust.livejournal.com]

I can try to help with that to.

Yeah... She gave me a job and she was nice to me when- when things got bad.

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

Son't want to pressure you into doing something like that for me. My head's a fucked up place.

She's a good person.

[lyra-of-dust.livejournal.com]

Everyone here's fucked up in one way or another, Cloud. Most of them, at least.

Yeah... She is.

(Have a moody, non drawling Reno)

[elevatorwarrior]

It's always easier talking with someone who's been through it. Comrades in arms, I think. People who weren't there will never really understand what it's like. You can describe but...

Eh...

Cloud, you really need to take a security class.

(have a talking a lot cloud)

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

It's never the same as being there. I owe him a lot but I just don't know if he gets what it was like, you know?

Maybe I am talking too much about things today. Who knows.

I think there's a curse preventing that.

(Relieved Reno?)

[elevatorwarrior]

It's good to talk about things. If ya don't you'll eventually just keep everything bottled, and you can't heal if you do that. Zack's your bud, he just wants what's best, but yeah... what people think isn't necessarily right, because of those kind of variables.

I got to ask, Cloud... what was it like having me here before? I'm not so stupid as that to think I wasn't.

(^^)

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

I know he does. He wants me to be happy and safe. But considering who I am, I'm not sure if it would happen.

Before? I don't know if you were. Unless that was the other Cloud. People talk like I was here before too.

[elevatorwarrior]

You know... I'd say you already were. You got a life here, and Lestat and Anita. Nothing'll erase the past, but here... lately I've been catching myself thinking it wouldn't be so bad to stay and see if the others are here.

Just some things I saw around.