69... ash settling on souls

[atouchofstrife]

private\\unhackable

We've all been there. Facing death and facing the aftermath of trying to clean up. If I should I could I, so many times I think about what I could have changed is I was a little faster, a little stronger, something, anything and I wonder what I would have lost instead. I've learned that sometimes the Lifestream will take who it will and I cannot stop it. I've learned that I can't always blame myself even when I was covered in the blood of thousands of people - SOLDIERs, infantrymen, citizens, all those people that stood between me and catching Sephiroth and stopping him. All those deaths are on my shoulders yet the ones that hurt worse were the ones closest to me. And when I got sick, those two were the ones I thought I've failed the most.

I didn't. They gave me so much strength and I never knew until I stood facing him again. His legacy - heh, the legacy of a madman, a country SOLDIER and a monster. How many pieces of them are a part of me now?

I'm - I just need to stop this thinking too much. And I need to get Zack to smile again. I'm tired of seeing him like this.
/private


Thanks for coming with me, Tifa. I hope you enjoyed the ride.

Vincent, any better?

Zack, need a Potion?

Anyone want to spar?

Comments

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

...Uh, you ever meet my parents? Pops was all stern and absentminded, and my mom was totally smothering and homely. I mean, I lecture kids that steal wallets, but that's only common sense!

Lies.

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

...*Cloud is chuckling here don't mind him*

If you say so.

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

It isn't funny, man! Seriously! What mother worries about her son's marital status when she hears he's the target in a manhunt? She's totally bonkers!

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

So she knows who gets the life insurance, that's the kind of mother.

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

That's just cold.

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

At least she paid enough attention to you to wonder about those things. Mine... sometimes she just wasn't there.

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

Single parents have it a lot harder, I hear?

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

I think that when my father disappeared, a part of her went with him.

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

Do you remember him at all?

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

...I never met him. All I know are tales.

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

From your mom, I take it? What kind of stuff?

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

He was always in the mountains and he brought back tales and rare things. A strong man, a quiet one, I think... I don't know.

Those memories are muddled.

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

I miss home.

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

I don't have one.

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

You've got Tifa.

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

Tifa and all my friends. They're my family now.

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

You seem a lot happier talking about them than you ever did talking about Nibelheim, back before everything happened.

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

I know.

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

...How was she, anyway?

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

Tifa?

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

Yeah. I didn't really find it my place to talk to her about... all that.

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

Angry. Upset. You two... she doesn't like seeing people beat themselves over things like that.

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

At least she's not as hypocritical as I am?

[private]

[cloudsinstrife.livejournal.com]

...I used to cheer her up, actually.

[private]

[plz-2-b-an-hero.livejournal.com]

You surprise me at every turn, you know.

In a good way.